Americans are socialized not to speak about race. We are taught that discussions that involve race are taboo. White people do not talk about race because they are afraid they will say the wrong thing and prove themselves to be racist. Or, they are afraid that surfacing the fact that they notice race is in and of itself racist.
People of color often find that if they try to raise the topic of race, they will be labeled negatively as a result. They will be seen as “over sensitive” as “making a mountain out of a mole hill” or worst of all: “playing the race card.” (For a wonderful article about why the term “playing the race card” is an absurdity because rather than serving as a valuable trump card, it’s more like the two of diamonds, see Tim Wise’s article, “What Kind of Card is Race?” )
But, how can we resolve our differences or rectify ongoing inequities if we can’t even talk about them?
A friend of mine shared a story about an incident in her daughter’s classroom recently. The class was making a time machine. While they were working on the project, their teacher, a white man, brought to class a copy of a newspaper from the day Pearl Harbor was bombed. He read an article from the paper that used the word “Jap” throughout the article. When he finished reading, he made no mention of the fact that the word “Jap” was used. My friend’s daughter, who is Japanese-American, understandably felt enormously uncomfortable. When the teacher made no mention of the use of this word, it felt to her as if he had sanctioned its use. And, it certainly left the class with an assumption that the word was OK to use.
She was relieved, therefore, when an African-American student in the class raised his hand and said he felt the use of the word “Jap” was the same as using the N word. His comment was followed by complete and utter silence. There was no place for this discussion to go because discussions about race are unknown and scary territory. So, what is the message the children in this classroom had reinforced for them? It’s not OK to talk about race.
When is the last time you had a talk about race?
Spot on, Deb.
As a white person, sometimes I feel that doing my “white homework” is almost like a second adolescence. There’s this painful process of suddenly seeing yourself as other people see you — and realizing that what other people see isn’t necessarily good.
It’s easy to want to recoil from that experience. But just like growing adolescents, each of us has to realize that in order to become grownups, we have to learn to come to terms with who we are and what we need to change.
Easy to say, hard to to. Even harder to convince others to take the leap.
We addressed this same topic in a story in the latest issue of Teaching Tolerance. http://www.tolerance.org/magazine/number-36-fall-2009/talking-race.
I’d be interested in hearing what you and your readers think about the article. What advice would you add, to help everyone become more comfortable in talking about race?
Tim,
That’s a great article. It clearly makes the point that we can’t expect our children to be able to talk about race when the teachers are unable to do so.
Thanks,
Deb
Tim, I followed your link and am delighted with the article and all the other resources available…I’ve forwarded this to my AmeriCorps members, their sites and other site directors…
Thanks for this, Deb. I have noticed another reason that people don’t talk about race. I first noticed this when I was helping to organize a conference for a music organization, and I wanted to have some sessions that touched on issues of race and class. Nobody disliked this idea, but there was a curious reluctance to create these sessions. It took me a while to figure out what was going on.
Nowadays many of us want to live in a society where race doesn’t affect people’s opportunities, but of course we don’t have that kind of society now. As far as I can see, the only way to move toward a society in which somebody’s race can be ignored, is to pay attention to issues of race now.
In other words, we have to do what feels like the opposite of our goal. For example, in order to work toward a society where everyone has equal opportunity, we have to notice who doesn’t have equal opportunity now, and whether any differences are related to race. Similarly, we have to look around in our board rooms and schools and businesses and notice whether race seems to bring any unfair advantages or disadvantages. In short, we have to pay attention to people’s race.
This feels very uncomfortable for people who aspire to make race a non-issue. It feels like moving backward. And I think that’s why I experienced that curious sort of squishy resistance when I wanted race to be a topic. Nobody was against it, but clearly the suggestion made people uncomfortable.
This may also help to explain why so many organizations have policies promoting equality and inclusiveness, but nevertheless don’t actually look very diverse. It takes work to change the racial mix of a group, and doing that work tends to feel uncomfortable partly because it feels contrary to the ideal of being race-blind.
But maybe race-blindness isn’t such a great ideal anyway, well-meaning though it might be. Race is one of many factors that contribute to a person’s uniqueness, and it would be a shame to ignore anybody’s uniqueness. Equality of opportunity is a fabulous goal, but it doesn’t require thinking of every human being as equal. So maybe there’s a way to work toward a society where opportunity is equal not by ignoring race, but by honoring (and even celebrating) individual differences.
John,
I agree completely about the need to NOT be color-blind. In fact,I wrote a post about that a while back:
http://www.guidingchange.org/blog/2007/10/01/color-blind/
Great to hear from you.
Deb