I understand the pain of not being believed, having my truth denied and my voice silenced. Difficult as it was for me to come forward to my family, I can only imagine how hard it has was for Doctor Christine Blasey Ford to testify in front of the Senate Judiciary Committee yesterday.
Even before Ford started her testimony, comments in the Live Stream chat box included such things as, “Lock her up,” “Let the perjury begin,” “She’s a ho,” and “She’s ugly.” It’s hard to comprehend the source of these venomous words. She was assumed to be a liar before she even spoke. Judge Kavanaugh, on the other hand, was simply a good man whose life Ford was trying to ruin.
What happened in the hearings is a prime example of how our society treats women. Ford testified in a gentle, even gracious manner. Despite being cross-examined by experienced prosecutor Rachel Mitchell about every possible detail of her allegations, she calmly answered each question matter-of-factly, to the “best of [her] ability.” Despite this, without allowing any investigation, Republicans denied her credibility.
When Kavanaugh testified, he was irate, loud, and openly talked back to Senators questioning him. He was viewed as defending his honor. Had Doctor Ford reacted that way, she would have been called hysterical and, perhaps, crazy.
When people vilify women who come forward, they treat them as if they have an ulterior motive for doing so. What do they think these women have to gain? Doctor Ford is a highly successful professor who stands to gain nothing from her testimony. Rather, she has a lot to lose. By coming forward, she has had to face a total violation of her privacy, leave her home because of receiving death threats, and cope with humiliating public and toxic online attacks.
What is the message the United States Senate is giving the women and girls of this country? If a Stanford University Professor with no possible motivation to lie is disbelieved and humiliated, how can we expect any woman, particularly women of color, to be willing to come forward?
Thank you Deb for articulating so clearly the momentous events in the Senate this week and the message sent across the country. A groundswell of anger is getting stronger and I hope it will manifest itself in millions of votes this November.
It is painful not to be believed but her testimony did not have compelling evidence. If he did do it [which her testimony did not persuade me to believe so], the fact that unfortunately she did not report it immediately to people in places of authority, either in the school or credible people in the community really worked against her, especially having waited this long to come forward. I know for a fact that many women suffer in silence because of fear. I see it every day. Part of the work for all of us is to empower women by providing avenues for them to be heard, but we should teach that it is their responsibility to make it known as these things lose power if not confronted as soon as possible, or if there are no witnesses or people who have been entrusted with this important information.
In my eyes, they both lost. If he did not do it, his reputation as a responsible, honorable, contributing citizen has been smeared and/or destroyed, and his family unit viscerally threatened. And if he did do it, Dr. Ford has suffered twice because she did not speak up until now. But there must be evidence. That’s a fundamental value of our society and we must honor our own processes and beliefs.
Well and powerfully said!
Well said. This is so distressing. Women’s rights just haven’t advanced much for decades.
It takes a miracle to admit that you have been violated and a wrong was done to you, and to believe that it was not your fault.
It takes courage to share that horrible experience with one person and to become super human existence to share it with the world.
As a girl, teenager, young adult, and woman when I was violated I wanted to tell NO ONE. I wanted it to go away and to believe, pretend, pray that it actually never happened. However, the physical and the pscyhological scars always remind me of my pain; and I try to push through–sometimes successfully, sometimes not so much.
I questioned everything I did (and still do) and never thought it was good enough; when in fact, it was brilliant by others’ account. I still suffer with my weight, always wanting to be the size I was before I was violated and seemingly staying fat, because I know that none will want to hurt me if I am not cute and petite.
If I ever knew that the men who violated me was in a powerful position where their decisions could affect my life and others in a negative way, I would break my silence to warn others about the content of the perpetrators’ character, as Dr. Anita Hill did and as Dr. Ford has done.
I would want him/them publicly castrated to prevent their decisions from showing up in their false sense of power and to basically punish all of them–I guess I am still angry. I would be certain that they stepped on many to get to this place of power and needed to stop. And, hopefully give myself a little bit of power back. They did not listen to Dr. Hill, maybe they will listen to Dr. Ford.
Thank you all for standing up and allowing yourselves to be poked and prodded as if you were on a slave block for sale or being hunted down during the Salem witch trials. NO MORE, it must end.
Thank you Deb. Amazing post as usual.
I am… your Ally, and hopefully more for all women, girls, daughters, friends.
Don